|My last chalkboard creation at ICC.|
I have not had any time to burn lately, but even if I would have had the time, it would not have been spent in the studio. When I do go out there, it's usually to grab a gift or to make sure the AC is still on. I haven't felt like painting or doing anything with my torch/metal/rocks in a while. I already mentioned some of the struggle that has occupied the first half of this year. What I'll add now is that eleven of the last twelve paintings have been sold for money...to pay bills, barter or fix cars, etc.
This final fact does not make me want to paint. It makes me want to get a different day job. And so I did.
Getting to this point was not easy. It took a chunk of time and burned down energy. Think Endings and Disintegration in the Hero's journey. I can say I was fully present with it, and I finished the process well.
I am finally in the Transformation stage, and I welcome it. I will consciously heal now. My new job means so much more than a steady paycheck. I expect this to be reflected in all of me, including the studio, which will eventually translate to creative blogging again. I am open and ready.